Not In My Name

There are despicable acts being carried out against a group of workers in our country, and it is being done in all of our names.

Let's first take the employer, Canada Post. A Crown corporation, supposedly at arm's length from the government, but there are two ministers with responsibility for it, among other things, so it would be difficult to say there is no influence. This is an employer that has shown itself to be draconian in many ways in the past, even timing bathroom breaks. They fired the first shot in the current dispute by suspending the benefits of their employees before there was any strike action on the part of the employees. Who does this? Private employers don't do this. There is historical practice of respecting the expired collective agreement until a new one is reached that has been ignored here. In all of our names.

The union started a series of rotating one-day strikes in selected cities. Yes, that's disruptive to the business, but I have to say that as an end user, I still got mail, just not on the two days that my city was touched by those strikes. Since midnight on Tuesday, 14 June, the corporation decided to lock out its employees across the country. I have not received a single piece of mail since then. So who is depriving me of my mail delivery? To me, it looks like it's the company. In all of our names.

Faced with this 'intolerable' situation, the government decided to legislate an end to this dispute rather than working to ensure that the two sides would negotiate their own settlement. Worse still, they decided to further undermine the collective bargaining process by reversing elements that had already been offered by the company, namely wage rates. Now this is not the central issue of the dispute for the union — this is much more about the effects of new technology and work safety, as well as pensions — but where does the government get the idea that it is appropriate to reduce the employer's offer of wage increases? Not much encouragement for the employer to take the subsequent negotiations seriously, in fact an assurance to the employer that the government is ready to give them everything they want and more. In all of our names.

Today is the Fête nationale in Québec and some are decrying the fact that the debate is being prolonged through this important national holiday, especially when the outcome is assured by the majority conservative government. Well, I have two things to say about that. First, I can't think of a better way to defend the values of Québec than by standing up against attacks on workers and the collective bargaining process. Bravo to our new NDP MPs for doing this. Second, does the fact that about 25% of the population (roughly 40% of the roughly 60% who voted) voted for a particular party, with our flawed system giving them a majority of seats as a consequence, mean that the rest of us should shut up and take it for the next four years? Would the Tories' supporters agree to do the same after losing a next election? I don't think so. The opposition is standing up to show their opposition to something that is wrong.

And I am glad they are doing this in my name.

Lanterns and Sleepers and Bears, Oh My!

Okay, not a movie review here, but the review of a movie experience anyway.

We went to see Green Lantern tonight, an extra Thursday movie outing in a week with a Friday statutory holiday. Yes, it was an action movie and there was plenty of that on the screen, but — much to our amusement — there was more in the cinema itself!

Well into the movie, in the midst of some of the corny dialogue, people around me started laughing. My first thought, of course, was for the poor director, whose movie was being laughed at. I was wrong and discovered that moments later when my own ears tuned into the sound of one moviegoer snoring. Rather loudly.

Now, I have been known to nod off in a film, even in the trailers beforehand. In fact, I have hardly been known to be awake for the whole of the cinema experience on any given night. I am [self] assured, however, that the first hint of a sleep sound from me is enough to wake me up, if only temporarily. I chalk all of this up to bad sleeping habits, not advancing age, of course.

Back to tonight's experience. This guy was loudly snoring in the front section of the cinema while a good two-thirds of the audience was laughing at him and our action film was unfolding on the screen. It was too much for one movie-goer: we'll call him the Bear, for reasons which are obvious for anyone with any degree of familiarity with gay archetypes.

The Bear got up, walked up to our snorer and gave him a smack, ending the snoring and starting an embarrassed awareness that eventually drove the snorer from the room in disgrace.

When one of my companions and I went to use the men's room after the film ended, there was the Bear and his companion! I felt the yellow force of fear rising up in me, hoping my breathing wouldn't set either of them off! I quickly locked myself in the handicapped stall (no reason to lack elbow room!) and the wildlife had moved on by the time I was done and came out.

I'm safe for another day, but I'm on the lookout for plaid and keeping my flight instincts tuned.

You Can Do It That Way If You Want

A classic story from my family.

My sister, visiting from Australia, decided to go into the card store to buy some postcards of the local scenery to send to her friends and family back home. The postcard display announced that they were 25 cents or 5 for a dollar, tax included. She selected 15 postcards she liked and presented them at the cash.

The cashier counted them carefully and announced that it would be $3.75. My sister said "But they're five for a dollar" and got the reply "But you have 15."

Frustrated, my sister pursued her line of argument. "You mean I could buy 5 for a dollar, go outside, come back in and buy the next 5 for a dollar, repeat once more and get the 15 for $3?"

"You can do it that way if you want" was the clever clerk's reply.

You can believe that this has become a catch phrase in my family: since each of us is always right in whatever we do, the sibling doing it differently is inevitably greeted by a chorus of "You can do it that way if you want" followed by peals of laughter.