PR12E02 Can’t a Model Catch a Break?

I’m getting a late start at my coverage of this season of Project Runway (not that I have written about any of the other seasons), but I wanted to see if I could write something that would complement the coverage I read voraciously on the blog I Should Be Laughing. His post on this particular episode here. Let’s see if I have something else to offer…

We started this week’s episode with the delivery of millions of dollars’ worth of jewelry in an armored car with armed security guards. You just knew that was going to impress Timothy (Mr. Sustainable Designer), and all went as predicted (not impressed by money or jewels). While I tend to agree with him on that particular point, he might be in the wrong line of work if he thinks he can be a top designer and continue eschewing those things. Maybe they are keeping him around for the entertainment value alone?

More ranting on Timothy. It was quite funny to see that when the designers chose their models for the week Timothy got last pick. This allowed someone else to choose Timothy’s model from last week, and she seemed relieved to not be facing another trip to the runway without makeup, hair…or shoes! Her relief may have been misplaced, though, as we shall see later. Timothy’s thinking about makeup seems to have changed this week, based on the very convincing affirmation of the l’Oréal guy that “l’Oréal is wonderful with sustainability.” Who needs more evidence than that? Not Timothy. Hair products, however, will have to wait for next week, I suppose.

We had some fin with Sandro this week. English is not his first language, as we can all tell from the accent and the word choices, and that leads to some funny expressions as he tries to communicate. I particularly loved “Does anybody have a pin? I need to sew my hookers.” I believe he was talking about hook fasteners, but I did laugh out loud. Not so cool, however, was the snarky “Speak proper English” from Ken when he and Sandro were having a verbal fight in the sewing room. Sandro does seem to be on the verge of a breakdown, flitting between anger and tears at the drop of a … hooker … so I’m a bit worried about how that will play out. I like how he hasn’t really bothered to learn everyone’s name, though, as exemplified in his calling out to Alexander while in line at Mood: “Hey, Red Hair….”.  Too funny.

Oh, one more Sandro thing. A horrible leopard print shirt he was wearing on sewing day. Not what you think, but the print depiction of a leopard hide stretched out for drying, or whatever one does with hides. Okay, two things. His pants on runway day were horrible: too high and beltless at the top. I’m expecting a lot more tacky coming from him, until he explodes and storms off, alternately shouting and crying as he walks into traffic outside the hotel or the work space.

Favourite critique lines of the week:

• Tim to Dom: “You don’t want her to look like a gold-digging floosie.”
• Tim to Timothy: “One hot mess. It has ticket home written all over it.”
• Zac to Sandro: “…it goes a little trashy.” (Michael Kors he isn't: MK would have had a lot more amusing things to say.)
• Still on Sandro’s creation, a sentence begin by Nina and completed by guest judge Eric Daman: “It walks the line between…” “…stripper and chic.”

So back to our unfortunate model. Last week, Timothy sent her down the runway in a dress he had “textured” by burning the nylon with a lighter (a very sustainable process, I’m sure), no makeup, no hair products and no shoes. He, however, wore some sparkly high heels for the occasion, which is just unkind toward his model! This week, she had the great fortune of having been chosen by Helen, who spent so much time offering unsolicited advice to her co-contestants that she ran out of time to finish her own look. Helen learned how not to do cups on a gown, which she had never done before, so a one-day competition would be a good time to learn, right? And her special technique on the sides ended up looking like “hairy hips” (as one judge put it), with some unintentional ruching on the back (Helen’s own words).

The so-called anonymity of the runway show was a little compromised when Helen burst into tears at the arrival of her model, causing an interruption while Heidi sent Tim over to calm her down. So our lucky model went from her accident victim look of week one with Timothy to a gown with deflated boobs, hairy hips and riding up in the back with Helen. She must be thinking that the model prize is a bit out of reach for her.