23 June 2011

Lanterns and Sleepers and Bears, Oh My!

Okay, not a movie review here, but the review of a movie experience anyway.

We went to see Green Lantern tonight, an extra Thursday movie outing in a week with a Friday statutory holiday. Yes, it was an action movie and there was plenty of that on the screen, but — much to our amusement — there was more in the cinema itself!

Well into the movie, in the midst of some of the corny dialogue, people around me started laughing. My first thought, of course, was for the poor director, whose movie was being laughed at. I was wrong and discovered that moments later when my own ears tuned into the sound of one moviegoer snoring. Rather loudly.

Now, I have been known to nod off in a film, even in the trailers beforehand. In fact, I have hardly been known to be awake for the whole of the cinema experience on any given night. I am [self] assured, however, that the first hint of a sleep sound from me is enough to wake me up, if only temporarily. I chalk all of this up to bad sleeping habits, not advancing age, of course.

Back to tonight's experience. This guy was loudly snoring in the front section of the cinema while a good two-thirds of the audience was laughing at him and our action film was unfolding on the screen. It was too much for one movie-goer: we'll call him the Bear, for reasons which are obvious for anyone with any degree of familiarity with gay archetypes.

The Bear got up, walked up to our snorer and gave him a smack, ending the snoring and starting an embarrassed awareness that eventually drove the snorer from the room in disgrace.

When one of my companions and I went to use the men's room after the film ended, there was the Bear and his companion! I felt the yellow force of fear rising up in me, hoping my breathing wouldn't set either of them off! I quickly locked myself in the handicapped stall (no reason to lack elbow room!) and the wildlife had moved on by the time I was done and came out.

I'm safe for another day, but I'm on the lookout for plaid and keeping my flight instincts tuned.

1 comment:

Aindriu said...

Never get between a bear and its entertainment.