It’s all about shoes this week! Don’t get me wrong: I really don’t understand the shoe thing, with a couple of exceptions, but these designers are all shoe-crazy and focused on some of the strangest things as inspirations. They visit the Marie Claire magazine closet, which Kate calls “a library of shoes”. Uh, okay.
Anne Fullenwider (how unfortunate a name for someone in fashion, and doesn’t fit her look either) is the Editor-in-Chief of Marie Claire and talks about the importance of shoes. Some people, she opines, start their outfit choices with their shoes each day: will I be going to a power meeting, a lunch or a hot date? Apparently, shoes do not take out the garbage or go do the laundry, or at least fashion doesn’t. The choice of the shoes for the challenge comes down to a quiz, except for last week’s winner Alexandria, who gets to choose first. The others have to buzz in first with the correct answer to get their turn at the shoe library.
Mood again (phew! 4th visit of 7 episodes), and we are treated to the dreadful spectacle of Tim allowing the little dog Swatch to lick his ear while he pretends to look for something down low. I am picturing some kind of fantasy revenge episode where Tim Gunn gets to make the judges humiliate themselves “for the sake of the show”. But we’ll get back to that at the end, too! (My, that’s a lot of projecting further into the article!) Oh, and worth noting here while we’re at mood: Miranda and Alexander both choose a predominantly red plaid with the intention of making pants out of them (they are slightly different). Everyone predicts a “battle of the plaids” and everyone is wrong.
Tired old phrases get trotted out for the critique: “It just looks inexpensive” “It makes her look old” “Who is she, where is she going?”. The best thing, though, is that the show has discovered how bitchy Ken can be in a most entertaining way. A sampling of this week’s comments to demonstrate why they will have to keep him to the end or bring him back as a guest judge/commentator in the future:
- “Bradon designed something for my great, great grandmother, in her casket.”
- “It looked like Amy Winehouse, after she OD’d.” (On Miranda’s model’s hair)
- “It’s time to bring out the knives and play the game like it used to be played.”
- “[Spoiler removed] is the winner. Her garment is old and I should definitely have taken it home.”
- “Such a mess. It’s hideous.” (Jeremy on Bradon’s look)
- “I know Miranda and I have the same fabric, but Miranda your [bleep] is ugly. It’s a crazy mess.” (Alexander)
- “They’re gonna rip her for that hair.” (Helen on Miranda’s model’s hair.)
- “Does not look current or modern to me.” (Heidi, yawn)
- “Verges on trampy.” (Zac)
- (Heidi notes that there are two similar plaids on the runway…and it didn’t help that one followed the other.)
- “Mix of 50’s and 60’s…I like the nerd alert, but it’s not kooky enough.” (Zac)
- “Where is the egg nog? Very Christmas, retro, but not in a good way.” (Nina)
- “It’s like she ran out of time at the top.” (Anne)
- “You just went so tortured up here.” (Nina, indicating the breastal area)
- “Frumpy dumpy.” (Zac)
- “Looks like someone’s grandmother’s pillows.” (Anne)
- “It’s a bad bridesmaid’s dress.” (Kaley, trying desperately to get in on the bitchfest)
The other “I’m a designer, so I will use big words to show how smart I am, but I mix them up and end up looking a little off” moment award goes to Kate. She says her look is a “diversion” from what she usually does. I think she means “divergence” but then again, I speak English and she apparently speaks designer, so what do I know?
The preview for next week is promising for two reasons:
- More humiliation for Tim as he is compelled to wear a referee outfit, complete with whistle (his revenge will be swee-eet, I’m sure!)
- Michael Kors returns to guest judge and to try to wrest back his bitchy queen title from Zac. I’m sure they will both bring their best comments to the match!